A low self-esteem is noticeable in all areas of life. In a variety of situations, it results in us not expressing our true opinions, not saying what we really think, can not prevail, or be open and honest.
If we are not self-confident, we stand in the way of many situations in the way and annoy us later on our own behavior. It does not matter if someone is jostling us at the cash desk, a colleague puts a massive mistake on us, a friend makes us unfounded allegations or we sit in a job interview and have to convince our counterpart of our qualities:
We never manage to say that which is actually on our tongue. We do not dare to defend ourselves, to stand by our opinion or to speak clearly and clearly to anyone. Our environment also shows us how self-confident (or not) we are.
We often give small, we rarely look other people in the eye, we talk very little, we are classified by other people as quiet and shy. Many people, however, do not know how to handle shy people because they do not know how to start a conversation with them and thus avoid contact.
Even getting to know women is not exactly easy when self-esteem is very low.
Tips for more self-confidence - how to change your appearance
What is it that is currently bothering you and your life?
Every person has points in his life with which he is dissatisfied. These can be different aspects. Whether it is that we have been unhappy in our profession for a long time, whether it is that we are not satisfied with our outward appearance.
But even character traits of ourselves can disturb us, yet we can not manage to go against them: laziness, the tendency to start and not finish things, fast falling motivation, no perseverance, all these are weaknesses that each of us more or less less well known and who also contribute to our dissatisfaction. We often try to tackle these weaknesses, but we can not keep up and change them forever.
Take your paper and pen and think about the points in your life that make you dissatisfied. Be honest to yourself! Write down the aspects that are hindering yourself and what exactly is in your way of leading your life as you would like to lead it.
What is this for? When we are dissatisfied with ourselves, our appearance, our behavior and character, or the way we shape our lives, it is no wonder that our self-esteem is very low.
Who loves himself, who acknowledges what he does, who appreciates his own opinion and meets himself with respect, gets more self-confidence by himself!
Work on the points you are dissatisfied with
Once you've made a list and diligently noted which aspects are currently unsatisfactory or even frustrating for you, it's time to tackle them.
Often these are little things that we can quickly change successfully. Other processes, on the other hand, take a long time and require perseverance and discipline. Whatever it is with you, you can do it and stick to it!
Do not make your self-esteem dependent on the affirmation of others
Compliments flatter the soul and do our heart good. Everyone likes to hear nice words from friends, acquaintances or colleagues. Nevertheless, we must not make our self-worth dependent on the opinion of people in our environment.
Of course it hurts when we hear that a colleague is talking bad about us. Of course, it gnaws at us somewhere when a friend pushes us a stupid comment because we've been gaining weight lately. Of course, it is uncomfortable when we notice exactly how we are patterned and then the person turns his eyes.
But the opinion of others should not matter to us at all! People who have to talk about stupid things about us, can slip down our hump! We can not be influenced by the negative opinion of others!
However, this rule also applies the other way around. Maybe we've lost a lot in the last few months, got a promotion, acquired a difficult skill, or done something else, but there's not a touch of appreciation from the environment. We do not care about that either. After all, we provide our services for ourselves, not others.
Search intensifies contact with strangers
When we are forced by external circumstances to approach and talk to strangers, we realize that our self-esteem is ever greater.
Conversations with people we do not know very well are often difficult. We do not know exactly what we can talk to them about, how they tick and whether one is sympathetic to each other. These uncertainties, which we have in contact with our new counterpart, also notices us to our counterpart.
In order to learn how to deal with these uncertainties and eventually overcome them, we should focus more on making new contacts. We have to use every opportunity to make a good conversation.
It does not matter if we are introduced to someone at a celebration, we meet people on our company from another department, or we find that we have new neighbors. And if only the small talk in the supermarket with an old lady in front of us at the cash register.
The more contact we have with other people, the more our self-esteem blossoms.
Be loving to you!
We tend to criticize ourselves in all situations. Thoughts of thought are relatively harmless
- Silly me
- It was clear that I could not do that
- My God, I should have known that
- I have once again thought too much
Such thoughts can in some cases spur us on to be better next time. The situation becomes critical when we are really hard on ourselves:
- I'm more stupid than ever
- I am never equal to this requirement, I lack all competencies for this
- I can never do that
- God I am stupid
- Everyone in this room knows more than me
- I'm fat and still can not do anything about it.
If we do not love ourselves, how are others supposed to be? We literally radiate our negative opinion about ourselves. Many people who have very strong self-doubt about their own person secretly hope that this will change as soon as they find a partner.
However, a partner helps only to a certain extent. Of course we gain more self-confidence at the beginning of the partnership because we feel affirmed. But the inner voice in us, which persuades us again and again that we are stupid, that we are not up to the task, that we are not attractive enough, etc., will reappear with time.
Only ourselves, only through our own attitude can we manage to meet ourselves with more love.
You also wish you had more confidence, but you know that you alone will not be able to become more self-confident? Then you should ask us for a flirt coaching for men. Our flirting professionals will show you how to get out of your shell and gain more self-confidence. You will learn how to overcome yourself, how to actively approach and flirt with strangers, and in the end ask her about her number. So that your life finally changes! We look forward to hearing from you!